I'm sitting here typing with my 4 month old son sitting in his bouncy seat next to me - he's giggling and looking straight at me, sweet and pure as can be. My heart is so full. I never knew a love like this until I held my son.
What's amazing is that God loves all of us 1,000 times more than I could ever love my son. He loves us as we are; sins are forgiven, and we are given the gift of grace. There is nothing we could ever to do deserve it - it is His gift to us because Jesus LOVES us. Amazed.
It's been one year since I saw that positive pregnancy test. We had a precious, perfect baby boy back in the fall and he's now 4 months old. He laughs, blows bubbles, rolls from tummy to back, and can hold his head pretty good. He is my angel.
Looking back over this blog reminds me of all the heartache, the pain, the suffering. But you know what? Every single tear was worth it. I don't regret anything. There was a purpose in my pain. I needed to wait, and completely give myself over to God and trust his timing. It was hard. It was unbearable at times. But I'd do again in a heartbeat for my precious baby boy.
My heart is so full sometimes it hurts. I have new worries and anxieties now - will my son live a long, happy life? Are we raising him right? But I am giving all that to God. I trust Him.
For those of you who are still waiting for your baby - please don't give up. God hears our cries. You will seek Him and find Him when you seek Him with all your heart (Jeremiah 29:13).
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