wait.

All I want is to be a mother.  I want it so bad.  I would give up everything to have a child of my own.  I have this uncontrollable longing, this aching, to be a mother, and I’ve felt this way for almost two years now. 

I’ve learned that sometimes God tells us to “wait my child, wait; your time will come.”  And if He says wait, I will wait. 

I was at a client’s home this past weekend for a newborn session, and the sweet little baby just would not go to sleep.  She was wide awake for nearly the entire three hours I was there.  I spent most of my time calming the mother and soothing the baby, waiting for her to fall asleep.  All it takes is five seconds for the perfect shot.  I patiently cuddled, swaddled and hummed to her until she fell asleep, and even then her eyes were closed just long enough for me to snap a couple shots.  She used the bathroom all over herself and the props, there were way too many people in the room, and by the end of the session the poor mom was completely worn out and so relieved we got some good shots and it was over.  When I was packing up everything to leave, she told me this: “You are going to be a great mother.  You are so patient.”

He says wait, and I will wait. 

I started crying a little in the car on the way home, because His plan is so divine and perfect.  He was clearly telling me through my client everything I needed to hear.  Just when I needed so badly for Him to speak to me, He does.  God never fails me.

So I will try my best to continue waiting.  I will try my best to have patience, and know God has a plan for me and my little one.

If You say go, we will go.

If You say wait, we will wait.

If You say “step out on the water”,

and they say it can’t be done,

we’ll fix our eyes on You

and we will come.